FREE AMP to the best bulls--t artist
Posted: Fri Dec 11, 2009 4:30 pm
Okay, here's an unusual offer, but one I'm pretty sure you're going to like. I've got a practically brand-new Behringer AT-108 acoustic guitar amp that I'd like to put up for adoption. It's a 15-watt amp with instrument, mic, and CD inputs, a headphone jack, plus tone and volume controls. It's a sweet little amp that will reproduce the sound of your acoustic guitar beautifully. I bought it just a few weeks ago because I wanted an inexpensive way to dip my toes into the world of amplification. Now that I've done that, I can see that I like the results when I amp my Taylor. So I bought a new amp with more goodies on it. And now the Behringer is sulking in a corner of my room.
Here's the deal
I'm giving this amp away. Free. This is a short paragraph, isn't it? Does this paragraph make my ass look big?
What you'll do to get it
All you have to do to win this amp is reply to this post with a compelling reason why you should be awarded this amp. Please note the following:
1. I'm a humor writer by occupation. You've got to be pretty clever to make me laugh.
2. If you can't be clever, at least be passionate.
3. If you can't be passionate, at least be desperate.
4. There is no requirement that a single word of what you write must be factual or verifiable. Lucky you.
Is everyone eligible to win?
In a word, no. There are a few restrictions:
1. The contest is open to regular TG forum contributors only. You must have at least 10 posts under your belt in order to be considered. I don't care about your karma points.
2. Your shipping address must be in the good ol' U.S. of A. While I would love to be able to ship this cute little amp to Chas in New Zealand or to Willem in Holland, it's just not financially practical to do so. (Sorry, boys. You don't seem like you need another amp anyway.)
3. One entry per person. To say the exact same thing yet another way, no multiple entries.
4. TotallyGuitars.com employees and their immediate family members are ineligible to participate in this contest. It's not like one of them was going to win anyway.
Prepare to dazzle with your B.S. skills
Be funny. Be creative. Keep it under 100 words. If you're successful, you'll win a sweet little amp. If you're not, you'll win my gratitude for participating.
Oh, one more thing: the contest is open for one week: from now until midnight (Pacific time) on December 18th. I'll announce the winner shortly after that.
Ready, lads and lassies? Get crackin'.
- Dennis (in Seattle)
* Don't you just hate any text that follows an asterisk? You just know it's going to be filled with bad news, disclaimers, and obtuse legalisms. Why should mine be any different? So let me just say the following: DennisG (aka Beefy D) is the sole arbiter of this contest. I'm sure my wife Jamie will likely read the entries, and possibly pee a little in her pants at some of the absurdities, but only DennisG will decide who actually wins. And while TotallyGuitars.com is aware of this contest and may, in fact, promote it, they have absolutely nothing to do with deciding who wins. Depending on my state of sobriety, that may or may not be a good thing.
Here's the deal
I'm giving this amp away. Free. This is a short paragraph, isn't it? Does this paragraph make my ass look big?
What you'll do to get it
All you have to do to win this amp is reply to this post with a compelling reason why you should be awarded this amp. Please note the following:
1. I'm a humor writer by occupation. You've got to be pretty clever to make me laugh.
2. If you can't be clever, at least be passionate.
3. If you can't be passionate, at least be desperate.
4. There is no requirement that a single word of what you write must be factual or verifiable. Lucky you.
Is everyone eligible to win?
In a word, no. There are a few restrictions:
1. The contest is open to regular TG forum contributors only. You must have at least 10 posts under your belt in order to be considered. I don't care about your karma points.
2. Your shipping address must be in the good ol' U.S. of A. While I would love to be able to ship this cute little amp to Chas in New Zealand or to Willem in Holland, it's just not financially practical to do so. (Sorry, boys. You don't seem like you need another amp anyway.)
3. One entry per person. To say the exact same thing yet another way, no multiple entries.
4. TotallyGuitars.com employees and their immediate family members are ineligible to participate in this contest. It's not like one of them was going to win anyway.
Prepare to dazzle with your B.S. skills
Be funny. Be creative. Keep it under 100 words. If you're successful, you'll win a sweet little amp. If you're not, you'll win my gratitude for participating.
Oh, one more thing: the contest is open for one week: from now until midnight (Pacific time) on December 18th. I'll announce the winner shortly after that.
Ready, lads and lassies? Get crackin'.
- Dennis (in Seattle)
* Don't you just hate any text that follows an asterisk? You just know it's going to be filled with bad news, disclaimers, and obtuse legalisms. Why should mine be any different? So let me just say the following: DennisG (aka Beefy D) is the sole arbiter of this contest. I'm sure my wife Jamie will likely read the entries, and possibly pee a little in her pants at some of the absurdities, but only DennisG will decide who actually wins. And while TotallyGuitars.com is aware of this contest and may, in fact, promote it, they have absolutely nothing to do with deciding who wins. Depending on my state of sobriety, that may or may not be a good thing.
