Learning guitar at an older age question

Lavallee
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Mon May 05, 2014 9:26 pm

You said :
My husband will be 57 next month, but these other members have him beat! He's read through a lot of the posts and says he's going to give a try. I think it will be fun to watch what happens. Thanks for joining in.[/quote]

Hi Jean I will also be 57 next month, life is just beginning. The most important point is to have fun: whether it is playing with you , learning theory, play camp fire song and sing, play against a a sound track, etc..., if picking up the guitar means it is a great part of the day, then it is a never ending story.

Daryl`s suggestion was great: horse with no name

Why not?

Marc


michelew
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Mon May 05, 2014 10:27 pm

Hi Jean,

Nice to hear you've inspired your hubby to pick up this instrument of torture, joy, fun and expression that has crept into all of our hearts.

My question to your Mr is 'If not now, then when?" There's no perfect time to start learning a new thing, but the sooner he starts the sooner he'll start to progress and be where he wants to be.

I learned a few chords as a teenager, but I didn't get serious until I found TG. I was about ....43. I've learned a STACK since then and when I focus I can learn to play things I never expected to be able to. I've also started to learn some instruments besides the guitar in the last...3 years or so.

I think the biggest obstacles to learning an instrument as an adult are:
- finding/making the time to learn and play most days when you have so many commitments and possible distractions - I often find I'm really tired by the time I've done all the things I HAVE to do. But, where there's a will, there's a way.

- accepting that you're going to feel like a little kid and be stumbling all over the place. We all want to be running before we've learned to even stand without holding on. It can hurt your brain feeling so incompetent, but as you know break it down and learn little things and before he knows it he'll be playing something cool and sounding just fine.

- keeping it fun. He has you to help there. When he has a few chords under his belt, he may be able to play with you. That's where some of the real fun is to be had as you know. Ive had a ball playing remotely with my TG friends . And some of the best music times I've had has been accompanying my daughter on the uke, while she plays my guitar and sings. Just simple stuff can really lift your spirits. In fact the uke could be a fun place for him to start learning and to build up some music confidence too. But of course it's not the guitar. :)

It's all about passion and staying with it. If he has a fun simple goal - a specific simple song, then that might help to motivate him.

Once he is able to play his first song, he'll get the bug. :)

Good luck and have fun.

M


fjeanmur
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Tue May 06, 2014 5:06 pm

Hey Marc and Michelle,

Thanks for the thoughtful responses. Marc, yes, life is just beginning and Daryl's suggestion of "Horse with No Name" is a good one. I had him try that and he said playing the guitar "is hard."

Michelle, you're right, if not now, when? My husband always regretted not learning to piano, but he came from a home where playing an instrument was seen as a waste of time. I regretted not having a piano for twenty years and when we finally got a used one for my daughter, well with work and responsibilities and so on, all the classical stuff I played as a teen was no longer within easy reach. And never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would pick up a guitar again.

So, yeah, I think he should try it and get past the "it's hard" because it is hard, but is there anything that is easy that's really worth it? I'm going to suggest he try the fifteen minutes a day suggestion. That might not seem too overwhelming.

Jean


AndyT
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Tue May 06, 2014 5:22 pm

If it wasn't hard, then everyone would do it and it wouldn't be special anymore.


michelew
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Tue May 06, 2014 10:32 pm

fjeanmur wrote:
Hey Marc and Michelle,

Thanks for the thoughtful responses. Marc, yes, life is just beginning and Daryl's suggestion of "Horse with No Name" is a good one. I had him try that and he said playing the guitar "is hard."

Michelle, you're right, if not now, when? My husband always regretted not learning to piano, but he came from a home where playing an instrument was seen as a waste of time. I regretted not having a piano for twenty years and when we finally got a used one for my daughter, well with work and responsibilities and so on, all the classical stuff I played as a teen was no longer within easy reach. And never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would pick up a guitar again.

So, yeah, I think he should try it and get past the "it's hard" because it is hard, but is there anything that is easy that's really worth it? I'm going to suggest he try the fifteen minutes a day suggestion. That might not seem too overwhelming.

Jean
I guess it will all come down to how much passion he has to learn this "hard" thing.

I don't see it as being "hard" per se. It's absolutely true that there are a stack of things to learn many of which have to happen simultaneously. I guess that's where great teachers shine. They are to able to break it down into manageable chunks; learn how to fret a simple chord, learn how to count beats, how to strum a simple rhythm, change between two simple chords, etc. Get him to work through the beginners' plan. Even playing a two chord song will require him to be proficient in a bunch of things which he will need to do all at the same time. Really he needs to learn one or two things at a time and then experiencing the pleasure that comes from making it work. No running just yet, learn crawl and then to stand first. :)

As adults, we tend to forget that we've learned a lot of complex things and that we once SUCKED at them because we had to learn all the little actions first and make them automatic; he probably drives now without even thinking about the many, many tasks that he's doing simultaneously.

Get him to watch Neil's blue print. http://www.totallyguitars.com/beginners.html

It's not as hard as he thinks, it's just a bunch of things all at once.

Once we stop being able to learn the things we want to .... Well I'm guessing that's when we really start to age quickly... So tell him it's a way to stay young. :)

But it must be nice that he's likely to have a slightly better appreciation for the skill you've developed.

M


BigBear
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Fri May 09, 2014 10:41 am

Hi Jean!! Andy always exaggerates! I'm only 79!! LOL! Just kidding. But I did just turn 60 so I'm only a few years older than your husband. A couple of points to ponder:

1. Wanting to play the guitar is MUCH easier than actually doing it. Any musical instrument takes a commitment and an ongoing commitment. It will hurt at first. And you will sound like garbage at first. Is your husband at a place in his life where he wants to take on this hobby?

2. If the answer is yes, you need to help him manage his expectations. Watching guitarists in a band or even soloists gives a very false impression. They are good because they make it look so easy. Neil is the worst. Everything he plays looks so simple and non-stressful. Getting to that level is probably impossible at any age over about 25. At 57 it will be very challenging to "get good". But you can make enormous progress even later in life. With the guitar you will as far as your time to practice allows.

3. Finally, medical studies have repeatedly shown that while listening to music has a calming effect on the brain it doesn't increase cognitive abilities. But playing music has a very positive effect on brain health. By itself this isn't necessarily a reason to take up guitar but playing any instrument, especially guitar, has a real positive benefit on anyone who plays. And I'll bet everyone on this site would agree that playing the guitar is a positive experience. Frustrating at times but ultimately gratifying.

Good luck to you and your husband. Just the fact you asked the questions shows how important your husband is to you. He is a lucky man.

Happy playing!

Cheers! :cheer:


fjeanmur
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Sat May 10, 2014 5:03 am

BigBear wrote:
Hi Jean!! Andy always exaggerates! I'm only 79!! LOL! Just kidding. But I did just turn 60 so I'm only a few years older than your husband. A couple of points to ponder:

1. Wanting to play the guitar is MUCH easier than actually doing it. Any musical instrument takes a commitment and an ongoing commitment. It will hurt at first. And you will sound like garbage at first. Is your husband at a place in his life where he wants to take on this hobby?

2. If the answer is yes, you need to help him manage his expectations. Watching guitarists in a band or even soloists gives a very false impression. They are good because they make it look so easy. Neil is the worst. Everything he plays looks so simple and non-stressful. Getting to that level is probably impossible at any age over about 25. At 57 it will be very challenging to "get good". But you can make enormous progress even later in life. With the guitar you will as far as your time to practice allows.

3. Finally, medical studies have repeatedly shown that while listening to music has a calming effect on the brain it doesn't increase cognitive abilities. But playing music has a very positive effect on brain health. By itself this isn't necessarily a reason to take up guitar but playing any instrument, especially guitar, has a real positive benefit on anyone who plays. And I'll bet everyone on this site would agree that playing the guitar is a positive experience. Frustrating at times but ultimately gratifying.

Good luck to you and your husband. Just the fact you asked the questions shows how important your husband is to you. He is a lucky man.

Happy playing!

Cheers! :cheer:
Hey Old Timer! (How old did Andy say you where? LOL)

Well thanks for weighing in. Actually so many people have sent words of advice and encouragement that I think The Weekend has arrived. My husband feels that fifteen minutes a day can be managed, so I think he can find fifteen minutes today. Tomorrow might be tough as he'll be slaving over a hot stove for Mother's . . . just kidding.

You're right about watching others play and how they make it look so easy. Did you see Neil's lesson on "Into the Mystic" and how he just through that horn part I there? Amazing! I just had to try it out.

Have a great weekend.

Jean


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