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Lyrics : Totally Guitars (Ruined My Life)

Well I used to have a life
And a dog and a wife
I had a job and paid my rent
And other bills to some extent

But now my wife and dog are gone
They’re with her mother in Tucson
They left a month or so ago
I really miss my dog, you know

And now my friends have gone as well
So all I’ve got’s this tale to tell
‘Bout how it all went wrong for me
When I signed up with TG

They told me that I changed
Became obsessive and deranged
My life had fallen off the rails
Wore flowery shirts and grew my nails

When, I got Totally Guitars
Now I know that someday soon I’m gonna be a star
But ‘til that day comes along – I can sing some good old songs
Cos’ I’ve got Totally Guitars

Now, we don’t care who you are
Size of your house or make of car
Come and join us don’t be shy
But kiss you other life goodbye

If you’re a Brit or European
American or Antipodean
It doesn’t matter where you’ve been
They even let Canadians in

And if you do decide to stay
You’ll have to practise every day
And post your new collaboration
To universal admiration

But listen carefully to this warning
Soon you’ll be logging on each morning
And another week comes and goes
Without a shower or change of clothes
When, I got Totally Guitars
Now I know that someday soon I’m gonna be a star
But ‘til that day comes along – I can sing some good old songs
Cos’ I’ve got Totally Guitars

Great entry Stuart!!!! I just hope that its not all true. Good luck - in the competition and in winning your life back. :S :unsure: :silly:

Absolutely fantastic, Stuart! Wonderful lyrics. That song's gotta be right at the top of the heap.

Very clever and funny, Stuart. Best line:

"If you’re a Brit or European", in my opinion.

That's a great entry!

Amazing entry, R. Loved everything aboot it.

It's truly unfortunate that you're not eligible to win due to your incorrect G-chord fingering at the :12 second mark.

Stuart I was grinning before you opened you mouth, looking at your very sad "It's been lonely in the saddle since my horse died" expression.

I agree with Dennis, those lyrics are a cut above.

After you win this contest I am proposing you sit the next one out and give the rest of us a chance!

And of course any humour at the expense of Canadians is always a treat eh Al!

Now get your harmonica ready...I'm going to be in touch soon.

Stuart:

That was awesome. Kind of along the lines of typical country songs.....My wife left me and took my dog, I miss him......

Great lyrics and playing. You gotta love any place that teaches us so we can pull this kind of crap...... :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo:

Superb entry, good luck!

J

Hey Stuart,

For my money the Best so far.Great song and fantistic lyrics.

Good luck with your song.

Kevin

Fantastic Stuart! brilliant lyrics and great performance... like Tony, I was laughing before you even sang the first word. Now we know why you've been so quite... that was a lot of text to memories (you must have done, you didn't raise your eyes once!). Great job!