Original song entry, "Welcome Back Home"

kelemenj
Posts: 20
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 12:40 pm
Status: Offline

Wed Nov 04, 2015 11:26 am

Hey TGers,
I came across a songwriting contest sponsered by a large retail chain. Luckily, I found it with a few days to spare before the submission deadline. I do know quite a few covers but I haven't really put too much effort in writing my own stuff. It was my goal to use the contest as motivation to actually create something.

Music to me, has been all about personal expression and not a competition. I disagree with treating it like a sport. I believe that everybody has something unique to contribute based on our unique lives, experiences, outlooks, etc.

Ok, that being said, I do need to generate a certain amount of internet traction for my entry to even be heard, so here is the video link

http://songwriter.amplifiertv.com/chann ... ey+Clement

I think views, shares, and likes are needed to get any consideration. Just the way it is.
More importantly, I would appreciate any feedback.

If I am out of line with this solicitation, I sincerely apoligise.
Regards,
John (Mickey)


TGNesh
Posts: 111
Joined: Tue Aug 24, 2010 8:25 am
Location: The Netherlands
Contact:
Status: Offline

Wed Nov 04, 2015 4:19 pm

Way to go John!

I'd love to read the lyrics, could you add those? Thanks!

Ness


kelemenj
Posts: 20
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 12:40 pm
Status: Offline

Wed Nov 04, 2015 8:00 pm

Thanks Ness,
I agree that the lyrics are a little difficult to decipher I would have re recorded it but I was up against a deadline. I got the song uploaded on the contest site with about 3 minutes to spare, anyway here are the lyrics


Welcome Back Home my child

Been out on your own quite awhile

But we always watched out for you


Rest now, you're surely tired

All of the years and the miles

Have taken their toll, it's true


You've had to navigate illusion

pain, fear, loss, and blind confusion


Join us, you're justified to walk on the other side

With your brothers and sisters too.


The once mundane disguising miracles

Watch life's refrain reveal a greater truth


The struggles and lessons that moved you back into the light

Were put there to help you through.

Show them the same love that pulled you out of your dark night

Stay gentle and kind and true.


They've had to navigate illusion

Pain, fear, loss, and blind confusion.

Help them to wake and rise and get to the other side,

They're your brothers and sisters too.


The once mundane disguising miracles

Watch life's refrain reveal the greater truth.


I woke up with tubes and wires

I had to get back to your smile

Now I know what I have to do.


Copyright © 2015 Mickey Clement
All Rights Reserved


crieniecat
Posts: 12
Joined: Thu Aug 14, 2014 11:33 am
Status: Offline

Thu Nov 05, 2015 6:12 am

John, stunning lyrics... Kind of speechless here...

Did you experience this yourself or were you inspired by someone?
From what I think the song is about, it is very inspiring to me, but I might misread it completely, so very curious about the background of this song.
( but not offended if you'd rather not answer)

Anyway, thank you for sharing this precious piece of art.
Highly appreciated.

Corina.


kelemenj
Posts: 20
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 12:40 pm
Status: Offline

Thu Nov 05, 2015 12:17 pm

Corina,
Thank you so much! You made my day. For the better part of the past year I have been been gigging at least 3 times a week, sometimes more. So as a performer I have developed a pretty thick skin. But putting this out there has left me feeling exposed and vulnerable.

On one hand, if the lyrics mean something to you, then that's what they should mean. I'd hate to ruin your interpretation.
That being said, I'll say this much. I was writing mostly about a near fatal industrial accident I had some years back. I could have really stayed or left.

I also have been reflecting on my father who I lost about a year ago this week. Working through some delayed grief I suppose.

Just thinking out loud here. I would love to hear it sung by a more talented singer. There have been a few collaborations on this forum. I would be up for it if you are.
Of course no pressure, either way. I think it would be worth doing.

Kind Regards,
John


michelew
Posts: 87
Joined: Sat Aug 22, 2009 5:43 pm
Location: Sydney, Australia
Status: Offline

Thu Nov 05, 2015 9:29 pm

John,

Big kudos for putting your entry in. Fantastic way to kick yourself into a more creative phase.

I really like your progression and your playing generally. Your lyrics are really powerful too.

You've obviously got great skills; playing and creativity. It's a pity you had to put this entry in so quickly. The sound quality reduces the impact of your song; I imagine it would be a really emotional journey if it was possible to hear it better.

On the issue of vocals, if you haven't explored it yet, I suggest you check out GarageBand. It allows you to do a bunch of things to vocal tracks that really improve them. Believe me I've used them to cheat quite a bit. :) I suspect you'd have a ball with the program generally, especially if you start getting into collaborations.

Let us know how you go in the competition. It's great seeing where people's creative pursuits lead them.

Thanks for sharing this with us.

Michele


kelemenj
Posts: 20
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 12:40 pm
Status: Offline

Fri Nov 06, 2015 12:01 am

Hey Michele,
Thanks for the feedback. I am definitely going to start upping the production value. Thanks for suggesting Garage Band. I honestly didn't even know what it was.

I was using pretty much just the webcam and a snowball mic. First the guitar was too loud, so I miked the vocals, then the guitar sounded, I guess "plinky", would describe it, so I chorused it out of desperation. I know that I probably committed sacrilege by running a Taylor 914ce through a chorused Roland Cube, I hope the guitar gods forgive me.

As far as the contest goes, my entry is pretty much a needle in a haystack. I have gotten some positive feedback which I genuinely appreciate. But it seems to me that the spoils are going to be rewarded to those who can just kill it on the social media platforms. That's fine.

I am just happy that I was able to write something. Maybe it's better then some and not as good as others. Who is to say. And who cares. All I can do is try to come up with something that resonates with my heart. That is really the grand prize for me.

Cheers,
John


crieniecat
Posts: 12
Joined: Thu Aug 14, 2014 11:33 am
Status: Offline

Fri Nov 06, 2015 8:19 am

John,

In fact, my interpretation of the lyrics was exactly that.
I saw it unfold by reading. It takes a lot of courage to be so open hearted, but when you do, it comes across ;)

Writing things down is always a good way to grieve and music is a powerful tool to it as well.
In fact, in my humble opinion music is able to replace any word as long as it's played from the heart.

With such a personal song it might be difficult to do it the right justice. So better think it through again :)
I'm certainly open to a collaboration. So if you really decide on it, let me hear your ideas and I'll see what I can do.
Please be aware of the fact though that I sing, just sing... ;) It's not like our lovely "Time Zone Zombies" that I am able to synchronise or put it all together in a wonderful video...

Anyway, please put up a new version of the song for all of us to hear. Maybe by using garageband as Michele suggested, your message will come across to many more and have them inspired too.

Encore, encore!
Corina :)


kelemenj
Posts: 20
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2012 12:40 pm
Status: Offline

Fri Nov 06, 2015 2:33 pm

Thanks Corina!
I do think a rework of this is in order. That will be my first order of business, then I can take it from there.

Once again, thanks for the kind words, :)

John


TGNesh
Posts: 111
Joined: Tue Aug 24, 2010 8:25 am
Location: The Netherlands
Contact:
Status: Offline

Sat Nov 07, 2015 4:20 am

Many thanks for posting the lyrics John! I'm glad I asked since they're, like Corina and others have pointed out, just stunning and powerful. How awesome to see you doing an original! I can very well relate to how that feels. Personally I play covers all over the place, but throwing out my own heart and soul....that feels pretty vulnerable :blink: . Last IGC I actually played a song of my own for the very first time in public. I could hide behind the dutch lyrics though, haha! :laugh:

I really liked the chord progression and melody of the again beautiful lyrics, in particular the going from F to Fm. It all really worked. My only feedback would be, (that's why I asked for the lyrics), to sing the words more clearly, so we can really hear the story. And maybe a half step down, but I can imagine if you'd disagree. I personally like your voice better when you don't have to stretch it too much, but again that's personal.

Overall, just awesome that you've posted this. It's actually nice to hear and see a more personal side of a musician. Well done John, looking forward to another, not so quickly recorded ;) , version!

Ness


Post Reply Previous topicNext topic