What happens if you play blues music backwards?
Your wife returns to you, your dog comes back to life, and you get out of prison.
Clean Musician/Music Joke of the Day
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cosmicmechanic
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A musician, getting on in years, was a bit worn out playing his guitar, and decided to take a walk in the woods.
He heard a voice pleading "Kiss me, and I'll turn back into a princess! ... your wish is my command!"
Looking around, he found the little frog that was calling out to him.
He reached down, picked up the frog, and put it into his pocket.
Out of the pocket came the voice: "Aren't you going to kiss me?".
He replied "At my age, you can have a lot of fun with a talking frog".
(OK, at least the words "musician" and "guitar" were in there
)
He heard a voice pleading "Kiss me, and I'll turn back into a princess! ... your wish is my command!"
Looking around, he found the little frog that was calling out to him.
He reached down, picked up the frog, and put it into his pocket.
Out of the pocket came the voice: "Aren't you going to kiss me?".
He replied "At my age, you can have a lot of fun with a talking frog".
(OK, at least the words "musician" and "guitar" were in there
)Jerry Garcia awoke in an all-white recording studio, surrounded by instruments.
Jimi Hendrix and Duane Allman were tuning their guitars. John Lennon was seated at the piano. Janis Joplin and Buddy Holly were warming up.
As he plugged into his amp, an awestruck Garcia murmured, "Wow! There really is a rock 'n' roll heaven!"
Elvis Presley said to him, "Heaven?....I don't think this Heaven!"
Just then Karen Carpenter sat down at the drums and said, "Okay, people. 'Close To You' ONE MORE TIME in E-flat. One, two, three, four..."
Jimi Hendrix and Duane Allman were tuning their guitars. John Lennon was seated at the piano. Janis Joplin and Buddy Holly were warming up.
As he plugged into his amp, an awestruck Garcia murmured, "Wow! There really is a rock 'n' roll heaven!"
Elvis Presley said to him, "Heaven?....I don't think this Heaven!"
Just then Karen Carpenter sat down at the drums and said, "Okay, people. 'Close To You' ONE MORE TIME in E-flat. One, two, three, four..."
St. Peter's still checking ID's. He asks a man, "What did you do on Earth?"
The man says, "I was a doctor."
St. Peter says, "Ok, go right through those pearly gates. Next! What did you do on Earth?"
"I was a school teacher."
"Go right through those pearly gates. Next! And what did you do on Earth?"
"I was a musician."
"Go around the side, up the freight elevator, through the kitchen..."
The man says, "I was a doctor."
St. Peter says, "Ok, go right through those pearly gates. Next! What did you do on Earth?"
"I was a school teacher."
"Go right through those pearly gates. Next! And what did you do on Earth?"
"I was a musician."
"Go around the side, up the freight elevator, through the kitchen..."
A first violinist, a second violinist, a virtuoso violist, and a bass player are at the four corners of a football field. At the signal, someone drops a 100 dollar bill in the middle of the field and they run to grab it. Who gets it?
The second violinist, because:
1. No first violinist is going anywhere for only 100 dollars.
2. There's no such thing as a virtuoso violist.
3. The bass player hasn't figured out what it's all about.
The second violinist, because:
1. No first violinist is going anywhere for only 100 dollars.
2. There's no such thing as a virtuoso violist.
3. The bass player hasn't figured out what it's all about.
Little Chas was practicing his guitar one day while Bear was in the other room reading. The dog, laying near Bear began to howl along with Chas' playing. Screech, buzz, wail, Howl they went for a good 30 minutes when Bear leaped off his chair and yelled at Chas, "For crying out loud! Will you play something the dog doesn't know!?"
Andy had just finished playing a gig, when he was handed an autograph book by a fan while in the lobby after a concert. "There's not much room on this page," he said. "What shall I write?" Another guitarist, standing by, offered the following helpful hint: "Write your repertoire."