Has The Focus Of This Thread Shifted? Bloody Hell Yes!! Totally Pirates!!!

[sandysue]

Thanks willem.

Syncopation good suggestion, I love it. Also maybe some base runs, hammer ons an pull offs? ( if I can pull that off) I really appreciate everyone's collaboration. It's so much more fun that way. This is the best pirate ship ever. ahoy mates

Sandy

[tombo1230]

Hi Sandy,
I think your doing great matey! Aaaarrrgggghh! Just one thing to say, you will most likely have to modify your lyrics to fit your melody when you have your music sorted out roughly in your head. So if you find your lyric lines are short in any way, just be a little bit more flowery with the words, or in other words, descriptive. It's the sort of thing you will adjust as you go and as you sing the song. What I am referring to I suppose is the pace of the song.

Try to have a little bit of a plan of how many bars per verse you are working to, maybe 8 or 12 for instance and most of all have fun with it. Just try to have an idea of structure in the back of your mind. All good musicians do, even the ones who wing it and scribble their lyrics on the back of a cigarette packet, a la the Beatles way back when. Try to decide what your chord structure for the verses is and when you come to the chorus it may be a good idea to start on the same one chord as the verse, but take the progression in another direction, i.e. different chords to change it up.

You probably know all this, but I mentioned it anyway. Good luck!

Tom N.

[sandysue]

Hi Tom

You are totally right. every time I even look at those lyrics, I keep wanting to edit them. I finally quit looking. I'm sure that as soon as I add music to the equation, it will change everything even more. I have to keep telling myself that song writing is a process, and not a single event. At least for me it's a process. It's easy to start feeling overwhelmed when I try and look at the big picture. Thank you so much for all of your help and advice, and the bloody good fun we've been having mate. I'm going to switch to that FOTW thread of Neil's now so I will meet you there. Hopefully Michelle will be there too, along with the rest of our shipmates, which includes everyone.

Sandy

[michelew]

sandysue wrote:

Thank you everyone for all of the encouragement. You're right Michelle. It's best to just record our ideas. I shot out of bed last night in the dark, in search of my pencil and paper, and nearly killed myself. I had no idea how risky song writing could be. I guess it's kinda like being a pirate.

I wrote the chorus on this last song. Here goes. I think it's going to be a campfire song with 3/4 timing. Anyway, see what you think:

Chorus

It seems I keep learning after the fact

When it's too late to take it all back

By the time I get older I'll be so smart

If only I were from the start

It's great to see you're working on a chorus Sandy. Since you're looking for collaborative suggestions, I'll add my 2 cents worth.

The chorus is cool, the meter and rhyming works well, but I'd suggest reserving it for a different song.

The verses you posted for Second Chance yesterday had an excited air of hope and possibility about them. The title itself suggests that too. This chorus feels quite different and seems to be defeated. "if only I'd learned from the start", "too late". Given the chorus is something you'll sing at least a couple of times, why not make it a positive thing. You've just started a song writing journey that's full of possibility, celebrate it.

Try working "second chance" into the chorus perhaps.

Like the line "Here's a second chance for us" (or maybe replace "us" with "love").


It felt more appropriate to comment on the chorus here. Happy to move other ideas to the FOTW thread or any other one you start.

Shel