Robin- Wrench offers some really good advice. I own two Taylor guitars and they are fantastic instruments but they aren't a panacea. Their great necks remind me a Fender Strat and when set up properly are a dream to play but they won't solve all your fingering problems.
Small hands may be more of a benefit than a detriment. I have very large hands (some would say paws!) and I've always fought the small fretboard on most guitars. As Wrench noted, many great guitarists have very small hands. Paul Simon was one of my inspirations to play the guitar and he has tiny hands yet plays a full-size 12 string beautifully.
For years I didn't use my pinky because it wouldn't cooperate with the other fingers. It had an attitude! But now I use it all the time. You can do so much with it that it's shocking.
It's all about commitment, technique and practice. Oh, and did I mention practice? LOL? Somebody said "play 'til your fingers bleed". That's not far from the truth!!
Good luck and happy playin'
